Self-Coaching Strategies: You Are the Kettle

Following my previous self-coaching post on making decisions, I received feedback regarding the idea of considering yourself first. I’ve been told it can feel uncomfortable, selfish and difficult. It excites me to present a topic eliciting such passion in our readers and I want to explore it further.

My objective in asking you to put yourself first is to recognize the abundance of energy you have when at your best. Earlier in the series, we defined that person in the post on boundaries; refer to your self-coaching journal for a refresher.

There is a difference between selfishness and self-care. When we are selfish, we take care of ourselves at the expense of others. Self-care is prioritizing our own well-being in order to give more to others. Enter the kettle metaphor.

When water is added to a kettle and it boils, the hot water is poured out to make delicious beverages. If a kettle boils for too long, the water evaporates and the kettle gets burned and charred. The kettle needs to be refilled in order to provide more tea. In the same way, you can only give so much before becoming depleted. Remembering to ‘refill yourself’ by prioritizing self-care means you’ll have the energy and ability to share your gifts with others.

Likely we have all had at least one great day over the past month. Who were you on that day? Someone who smiled when you woke from a solid night’s sleep? Who walked with pep? Who engaged in meaningful conversations with colleagues and loved ones? When you’re on, it feels magical. Others feel it, too, and they are drawn to you because of it. Becoming mindful of what it takes to ‘refill your kettle’ can lead to more days like this.

Let’s set ourselves up the best way we can, to achieve more days like this. Using your self-coaching journal, identify the most important things you can do to prioritize self-care. What makes you feel the most you and energized? (Hint: getting enough sleep each night is a great place to start.)

Remembering that you are the kettle is an important way you take care of you.

Enjoyed this post and want more? Read previous posts from our Self-Coaching blog series: Decisions, Decisions or Boundaries.