19 Aug Friday Check-Ins
I’m feeling a bit melancholy this week. My hopes of Labor Day being this magical time when life returns to ‘a new normal’ will not come to fruition. I now know people who have COVID-19 and fortunately are fighting through it. Students are once again in virtual classrooms. The college football season hangs in the balance, along with several Fall family gatherings. Instead, we get to look forward to days largely spent at home, blending and running into each other. My brother described it perfectly when he said, “It feels like March 172nd.”
When I’ve experienced weeks like this, I am glad to have an outlet on Friday evenings to talk with my husband, Mike. At the beginning of 2020, we decided that Friday nights would be a time dedicated to checking in with each other. Though we communicate each day, Fridays have become special, allowing us to dig deeper, to be vulnerable and to open up about what is going on inside of us.
Every individual processes emotions and reactions to life’s happenings differently. Mike and I are no exception. Some may prefer to keep trucking along, internalizing the good, the bad, the very ugly, while keeping a stiff upper lip. Others may want to talk daily about everything in detail, possibly overwhelming the individual receiving this mind dump. Setting aside time to intentionally check in with each other ensures we have a good understanding of our well-being from week to week.
If you are fortunate enough to have someone with whom to share your thoughts, I recommend considering questions like the ones Mike and I ask and answer on Fridays:
- Give a 1 to 5 rating for your satisfaction in the following areas last week (1 = low, 5 = high):
- Quality of life
- Overall well-being right now
- What are 5 things you are grateful for this week?
- What are 2 things you did this week you would like to do differently next time?
- What brought you the most joy this week?
- What is one way I can help you next week?
What Mike and I learn each week allows us to better support each other, to identify and curb trends in our behavior before they become obstacles and to learn what it is we cherish most. I encourage you to use the above questions or create your own. It’s amazing to experience the peace that comes from articulating open and honest thoughts, and how the reciprocation of feedback from someone dear to you will deepen your relationship.
Sharing your feelings by checking in with a loved one is an important way you take care of you.